Obsessively ranking, knowing better, and talking turkey in miraculously spangled garb.

Shaking leaves of streamers from the liber-tree

Search This Blog

Sunday, April 18, 2010

My favorite current-ish names in baseball, ranked.


These rankings come from an intense study of every name in baseball and the application of an arcane formula measuring fascinating sounds, divine comedy, and baseball propriety.

Burke Badenhop, Burke Heinrich Badehop, Florida Marlins
Placido Polanco, Philadelphia Phillies
Skip Schumaker, St. Louis Cardinals
Milton Bradley, Seattle Mariners
Coco Crisp, Oakland Athletics
Esteban Yan, Bridgeport Bluefish
Boof Bonser, Boston Red Sox
Fu-Ti Ne, Detroit Tigers
Jair Jurrjens, Atlanta Braves
Tomo Ohka, Yokohama BayStars
Rusty Ryal, Arizona Diamondbacks
Asdrubal Cabrera, Clevland Indians
Antonio Bastardo, Philadelphia Phillies
Mark Buehrle, Cicago White Sox
Kenshin Kawakami, Braves
Melky Cabrera, Braves
Ubaldo Jimenez, Colorado Rockies
Juan Pierre, White Sox
Carlos Marmol, Chicago Cubs
Fernando Tatis, New York Mets
Will Ohman, Baltimore Orioles
Evan Longoria, Tampa Bay Rays
Elvis Andrus, Texas Rangers
Homer Bailey, Cincinnati Reds
Bobby Seay, Detroit Tigers
Dan Uggla, Florida Marlins
Ryan Theroit, Cubs
J.J. Putz, White Sox
Felix Pie, Orioles

No comments:

Post a Comment