Kentucky Derby, I love thee.

Boy oh boy am I partial to the Kentucky Derby. There's plenty distasteful, even disgraceful, about the Run for the Roses mind you; the exclusionary wealth, the degenerate gambling, the shattered femurs, the barfed burgoo. But it's still the most exciting two minutes in sports, hooves down. Horses like to run, and I like to watch them run.

I think the Derby is a part of Americana that people should get excited about. Maybe more interest from the public will change what's rotten in Kentucky, most importantly the irresponsible genetic wizardry that grows monster horses with bodies modified to betray them. That really needs some oversight, because breeders are going to keep pushing until horses run so fast that their manes blow off. I don't know how to do it, but if we can get breeders to stop acting like mad scientists, it will go a long way toward making horse racing ethical. Because, gene-splicing aside, owners treat their horses really well.

Now that the public service address is over, here's my guess for the 2010 Kentucky Derby:

Win: Jackson Bend
Nick Zito, horse-whisperer, turned this plucky hoss into the John Wilkes Booth of horseracing. He's going to creep up and assassinate the derby from behind.
Place: Noble's Promise
This blog's official racehorse.
Show: Lookin At Lucky
The favorite has an unfavorable pole position.
Fourth: Awesome Act 
The Brit can steal the race if things get ugly; he's got the strength of a working class hero.
Fifth: Ice Box
Did you know Bryan Adams passed on recording "Danger Zone" for the Top Gun soundtrack because he disapproved of the film's advocacy of jingoism? It's like that.
Sixth: Discreetly Mine
30-1 odds, but the classiest name in the field. 
Seventh: Conveyance
The only thing I appreciate more than a horse of serious disposition is a handsome dog. Yet, somehow, rooting for this gray rocket feels like rooting for the Iron Sheik.  
Eighth: Devil May Care
You know I loves a filly, but this filly can't make it work.
Ninth: Stately Victor
This pony likes the wet track; I dislike that someone found his pointy head "stately."
Tenth: American Lion
Kentucky-bred cruiser is gonna scrap through the mud. However, as his name is a reference to Andrew Jackson, he can suck it.

Longshot with the best chance to shock the world:  Backtalk
I have a lot of love for Smarty Jones' son, 50-1 kind of love. He's won on a sloppy track before.

Here are Jay Cronley's thoughts from espn.com: 

Here's the field, according to post.
1. Lookin At Lucky -- Mayday or payday?
2. Ice Box -- Remember the Giacomo.
3. Noble's Promise -- Lucky's second skin.
4. Super Saver -- Of ground, here.
5. Line of David -- Has never been favored.
6. Stately Victory -- Didn't dig dirt.
7. American Lion -- Have lost money on much, much, much worse.
8. Dean's Kitten -- Has dime Super written all over it at 50-1.
9. Make Music for Me -- Won one.
10. Paddy O'Prado -- Kind 'o slow.
11. Devil May Care -- Program odds of 10-1 would be 20-1 on a male.
12. Conveyance -- One-trick jet.
13. Jackson Bend -- Super bracket buster never beyond second in nine.
14. Mission Impazible -- Beyer graph line always up.
15. Discreetly Mine -- Caught speeding.
16. Awesome Act -- Wiseacre and wise guy trendy pick.
17. Dublin -- Yes, THAT Mr. Lukas.
18. Backtalk -- Beat three in Cajun soup.
19. Homeboykris -- Got owners tremendous seats.
20. Sidney's Candy -- Look out below.

Picks:

1. Lookin At Lucky -- Two scores from rails past, two scores from number two gate spot.
2. Noble's Promise -- What's not to like.
3. Super Saver -- Same combo won by a mile here in the fall.
4. Awesome Act -- Big finish.